I’m off the road and back in Tennessee after a month of work, seeing great friends in Florida and Indiana, kayaking out of a surprise thunderstorm (@erica),

book signings, having a claustrophobic panic attack in the middle of my graduate school commencement, taking Samson on his-first ever boat ride (for result, see pic at the end), 

meeting my newest favorite tiny human (@paige), and laughing about misheard song lyrics (hear Chris Stapleton’s ‘Parachute’ and then hear one of my friends (@alie) sing at the top of her lungs ‘baby, I will be your… pair of shoes’?!).  For the record, I will never be able to hear that song again without laughing through it and (said with love) I hope we’ve ‘ruined’ it for you too.  

Photo credit: Brianna Foster, IG @brifosterphotog

That string of adventures and challenges had me earning my sleep every night, falling into bed with heavy limbs, and held with it endless and unforgiving reminders that I’m not 17 anymore.  So, as much fun as it was, I gleefully find myself returned to the mountains, surrounded by my tribe, and elbow-deep in writing Refuge Red, Book Two of the Refuge Trilogy.

A few days ago, a fellow author wrote and asked me if I like the process of writing.  Well, I don’t like it.  And by that I mean, I don’t just like it.  I count down the minutes of the work day so I can finally get to pop open ‘the other’ computer and get back to the story, or back to the blog, or back to one of the other projects on the dreamwork list.  

It’s a special thing, I think, to love something like that.  I think that’s what it feels like to know you’re doing what God made you to do.  And I don’t dread it.  And I don’t just like it, either.  Saying “I love it” here smells like a strong kind of cheesy so I’m just going to leave it there:  

I don’t just like writing.   

Getting back into Refuge Red though, has me taking a deeper look at the characters who make up the cast.  In the books to come – those outside the trilogy – readers will more often hear from only one or two voices, so I love that in The Refuge Trilogy, readers interact with a vast and varied cast of 8 – 12 distinct voices.   

I can’t come near picking a favorite, because they are so unique in experience, age, background, and personality – as are we all.  As such, it may be a well-spent detour to take a break from the blog voice and use a post every-so-often to deep dive our favorite personalities of The Refuge.  

So, now that we’re good and warmed up, let’s spend some time with Mae.  

SPOILER-FREE CHARACTER DIVES: MAE

I didn’t realize it at the time, but I wrote a lot of my mom into Mae’s character profile. 

Maybe it’s because Mae is the primary maternal figure in The Refuge Trilogy, and it’s natural to write the mom you have… but I don’t think that’s the reason.  At least not entirely. 

Mae is foundational to the storyline.  By this I mean the entire world of Physis is impacted by Mae’s choices.  Mae doesn’t need a spotlight.  She is light producing on her own – without the flood lights, without the audience.  She doesn’t need it.  She knows who she is, she knows why she exists, and she’s pursuing it with her every energy, regardless of the opinion of the culture that surrounds her.  She experiences overwhelming hardship, excruciating loss, and unforgiving circumstances and yet – she leads her community with ears that listen and with a heart full of grace.  She pours herself out and into the people that make up her community, regardless of their histories, their mistakes, or their current states. 

My favorite thing about Mae is that she refuses to feel sorry for herself.  She will not let self-pity win.  She’s been elbow deep in crisis throughout her life, but it doesn’t drown her, it drives her. 

What is it about Mae that allows her to accept the circumstances of her life and consistently move into the chaos with calm?  And can we do that more often?  

Mae is wholly unafraid of darkness.  She is physically the most vulnerable of them all, powdered with age and tiny in framing but simultaneously the most courageous, the most willing to address hardship, all the while coaching the rest of the cast to the do the same. 

World, you just met my mom. 

It’s natural, I think, to write the people around us into our characters.  I read somewhere that as authors there are parts of us, and parts of the people that make up our communities, in every character we write.  As I consider the various personalities that make up the cast of The Refuge Trilogy, I can’t help but observe and agree with that statement.  And, if they allow me, along the way I’ll introduce you to each of the influences that impacted The Refuge cast as we journey. 

Mae’s influence was easy to identify.  It is particularly familiar and a carefully accurate portrayal of part of what makes up my own foundation – my mom.  And no, she’s not comfortable with all these words about her, but she loves me, so she’ll allow it.  (Won’t you, mama.)

Mae in One Word

In one word, Mae is immoveable.  She is as sure as iron.  It’s what I admire about her, and what I want to be more like. 

I’d love to hear your thoughts on Mae. What makes her so steadfast?  What’s your one word to describe her?   And most importantly, what can we learn from her?  I’d also love to hear your favorite misheard song lyrics because that’s a gift that just keeps on giving.  

One last thing:  here’s that picture of Samson I promised.  It took a solid five minutes to talk him into getting into the boat, which may or may not have ended with me physically shoving him in, but he did it.  And he loved it.  

(He gives me the side eye every time we near a dock now, though.).